[Shaker] [&] [Mover]

Agent[]Asshole

13 notes

My superpower is that people will just tell me things.

Back when I was getting my first Covid shot the pharmacist was on break so I was standing talking to the pharm tech. This women told me everything. Even the vibrator she was looking to buy. I was like oh holy damn girl you get that shit you do you!

There are others but this is that one’s the most crazy one I can currently remember. If I come up with anymore I’ll add to this thanks for coming to my Ted talk. Also if this is you. Like you are the person who will tell me things keep it up you’re doing great!

Filed under aa approved message. aa approved message

25,553 notes

supergameboytwo:

catmask:

one thing about tumblr users isthat they love to disagree with posts. another thing is that they love to do is disagree with things that were not even in the post as if they were

this is just absolutely not true. people do not normally drink printer ink.

(via mazarinedrake)

4,654 notes

dzamie:

kimifeathers:

image
image

So I had my laces repeatedly undone by an oversized pigeon today.

While I was retying one shoe, they undid the other. And then proceeded to jump onto the bench to untie the ones I was retying.

Victoria Crowned Pigeon! They are Large and do not fear visitors.

(via the-grey-hunt)

120,548 notes

commandtower-solring-go:

livefromtheloam:

calidotgov:

image

congratulations piracy

Ad agency: Please don’t steal the King’s potatoes, no matter how easy it is.

Regular people: Wait, the King has easily stolen potatoes? How do I get in on this?

Internet users who have been stealing potatoes for years: We made a machine that picks so many potatoes and also that machine is free. Enjoy!

Ad agency: you wouldn’t steal a movie?

10 year old me with 0 income and no movie: YOU CAN STEAL MOVIES????

(via lapin-noire)